Family Life

Unhealthy competition?

My wife and I have a mostly friendly unspoken competition going. We don’t like to ask each other for help. Ever. The mindset of this is mostly that if we can do it all, then we’re unburdening the other from the duty. Unfortunately this competitiion has usually manifested itself in the form of heavy lifting.

When we unpack the car, I usually grab the baby in the carseat and she runs around to grab all our stuff: work bags, groceries, baby stuff, etc. Which can get damn heavy! Then I’ll try to grab something off of her, so she isn’t quite so pack mule-ish and it is a laughing race into the house.

This weekend, though, it went too far. I was ripping out old plaster from the bathroom I gutted and I filled a large wheeled trashcan with the stuff. I wheeled the full can out to the gate and left it there, to go sweep up. The thing was HEAVY. Wow, heavy. My wife thought she’d help and unlock the gate and take the trash can out so it would be ready for pickup. Did this without my knowledge.

So I hear this faint voice calling me from outside a short time later. I walk out to see my wife under the trashcan. She tipped it to wheel it out and then realized just how heavy it was. Lots of emotions ran through me as I was carefully lifting the can off of her legs. Anger at the whole competition, fear if she was okay or not, amusement at the whole situation. The three and more emotions kept cycling through me as I make sure she was okay and then lugged the can out to the edge of the driveway.

As of today, her thighs and butt still hurt a little, but she’s okay. The competition, though, apparently, is still going strong.

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